My TEST IS TOMORROW...

Send good vibes my way peoples!!! I have been studying like a mad dog and my test is tomorrow (oh crap, it is 12:05am), so TODAY in LA at 1PM!

I want this more than anything right now and I doubt myself every waking minute because I failed it 3 years ago...I would study and sleep, I would wake up from naps, would study and then sleep, and now I am WIDE AWAKE and CRAMMING! My test has been delayed over the past several months due to death, life, work, etc. BUT TOMORROW IS THE DAY! WHEW... i can barely say that without my stomach turning into knots. I know I know... it is just a test right? But I freeze up really bad when taking major exams!

This is why I have been absent. Stress. Worry. Life. Insurance. Test.

If I pass, I will be on line tomorrow having a celebratory drink on my behalf! If not I will be crying myself to sleep and taking the exam on Wednesday!

Until then,
Peace. Love. Happiness. And to all a good NIGHT! Oh and Happy Father's Day to those of you that have born children of the corn! Hee Hee

2 Weeks Silent....

I did it!!! Didn't think I could or would but I did... What was it that I did? Well I am SURE everyone noticed but I took a 2 week hiatus from my blog. Why? I don't know. It wasn't something I planned. The last post was not intentional (being blank) but when I posted it and then left it that way, I decided okay let's see how long I can keep my mouth shut. 2 weeks is a long time to stay silent.

I was feeling stressed out. Pressure from not being able to check every one's blogs everyday. Getting caught up at times with it that I actually would lie awake at night thinking of this person or that person's life, etc. while all along my own life needed some TLC. Does anyone ever feel this way? Or am I a NUT? Go ahead you can be honest. I can take it!

And also my test is Monday. I know I know... it got pushed back one week because my boss was in New York on vacation and I was swamped at work. Then last week I had a death in my husband's family. That was stressful and consuming and driving back and forth to Orange County. stressful. exhausting. EXPENSIVE! Gas here in Cali is $4.49 per gallon and we have a HUGE Diesel Truck that is over $5 per gallon. I think I need to start hooking just to pay for gas!!!! ;)~

Then I had to finish my year with my Brownie Troop.
Then today is my daughter's last day of 2nd grade! I can't believe it. I remember walking her to her first day of kindergarten like it was yesterday... boo hoo hoo.
Then my dog ate my mother's glasses and attacked her. Had to send him off to the rescue shelter.
Then I threw my neck out from studying and being stressed.

Anyways... have you missed me? ;)~
Okay let me go check out HNT!

Getting up close and personal...

you are all aware i have not blogged in some time. mostly of my test that i have been diligently studying for (scheduled (again) now for June 9Th), but also for something more personal. someone more personal i should say... my sister.

FYI: i have been in a funk since she left and blogging was our way of staying in touch with each other. funny but we both have been kinda sorta "absent" in a way...

we have a weird and complicated relationship (as do most families) but this time her leaving the states caused me major sadness and agony. seeing her as a mother and having my nephew here was something very special to me! 2.5 months we had this year together. granted she always is the one to come here but not for as long... 2.5 months does wonders (and here we thought we would KILL each other, not thought.. i think she actually planned a scheme!) and that is a lot of time together after 5 years of her being gone. and after how many years since we actually lived together??? MANY. I do not want to age myself in this blog, only her... (snort) (cough) ;)~

she made me start this blog almost one year ago (June sometime i think) because she moved overseas from Texas (fell in love) but swore that blogging would keep us "connected"! she set it up for me. she picked out the very first layout, fonts, colors, you name it. she even named it "Jahooni World". my nickname in Arabic is Jahooni (jahooni=?, i dunno???) she has yet to explain it to me. do tell tania!

it took me months i think to call to ask for my log-in and password (lol- i have come far) and she also thinks I live in my own little "world in Cali" (which BTW I have lived here pretty much on my own since the day I walked down my High School graduation podium! so maybe jahooni world = me?, i dunno?) but it's been almost a year now of blogging so this next step for me, is well... a step. a first.

my sister is a poet. she writes. she expresses herself in her words. her thoughts. her sentences. her "being". she inspires me.

this is for her...

THE RAIN IS FALLING
SOMETIMES HARD SOMETIMES SOFTLY
JUST LIKE OUR WORDS
SOMETIMES HARD SOMETIMES SOFTLY

I THINK OF YOU. OF HIM.
I THINK OF US, HER, YOU AND ME.
LAUGHING
PLAYING
DANCING
ARGUING
TALKING
CRYING
JUST BEING...

AND THE RAIN KEEPS FALLING
DO YOU HEAR IT? CAN YOU FEEL IT?
IT IS WARM. STREAMING DOWN FROM THE SKY SO SOFTLY.

I THINK OF YOU WITH YOUR HAND IN THE AIR
TOUCHING THE DROPS
HE IS TOUCHING THE DROPS
SHE IS TOUCHING THE DROPS
I AM TOUCHING THE DROPS
AND WE ARE TOGETHER AGAIN

SO SOFTLY...

Back... Kinda, Sorta.

my test has been postponed to june 9th. i was ready kinda sorta for 2 days from now but again my assistant is in Hawaii and there is about a 100+2x1000= things to do this week in my office... so anyhoo, until then. but i am ready. so ready that i gave myself a stiff neck from hoovering over the laptop and monitor over the last couple weeks... but anyhoo,

i am going now to check on YOU!

Stressed OUT!

I have been absent. Have you noticed? Or do you care???? ;)~

The reason being: I have my TEST next Thursday in San Diego. A test that I failed over 3 years ago and a test that even though I know must of the stuff, I am freaking out to take it again.... tests scare me. I freeze up. I have so much pressure from work that it even makes it worse for me. And my "assistant"... well she left again today for Hawaii even though she knew I needed time off for it! Lordy, why can't I live in her shoes for one day... or at least one week in Hawaii?!

I spent Mother's Day weekend alone at home while my family was camping and having a grand ole' time! How sucky was that? Yep, it sucked. But I had to study.

Dedication and hard work they say is what it will take to pass it. I am tyring but it's been tuff. I need a HUG. My brain feels like Jello. My body aches.

I am not gone forever and hope that everyone will be around again to Congrat me once I have passed or to console me if I don't... stay tuned.

yummy and more...

The concert was great... tons of acts. Eagles were of course the Eagles BUT




THIS MAN! He was Yummy. All over Yummy. Mike Ness is fantabulous in concert! Rock on I say....

Cheers!